Why modern dating in my 20’s is killing me off

July 3, 2018

So.

Let me get real with you here – I’m single and actively dating. I will happily admit that. BUT 10 points to whoever can answer me this:

When did dating become so shitty? 

The more I put myself out there and “date”, the more I want to stab myself in the eyes with scissors. I mean, even the term dating confuses the crap out of me.

Is it down to the fact I come from a generation where dating is no more than casual hookups and technology induced awkward interactions between two people who have no idea what they’re doing?

It’s soul-crushing.

OR is it that I’m just dating complete and utter dickheads who have absolutely no intention aside from getting in my pants?

I’m gonna place a bet on the latter. I’ll be clear – I’m not saying I want a relationship but I kinda just want to hang with a guy, take spontaneous car rides at 2am, stuff our faces with pizza, watch movies and visit new places.. so yeah basically a relationship but without it being a relationship…

Confusing right?

I was talking to mum and we had this whole conversation on what dating meant to her. Back in the olden days – I kid she’s not actually that old – the term dating meant you were exclusive to one person.. all be it if it was just for a week or two. Bottom line you were boyfriend and girlfriend.

Enter 2018 and it gets a whole lot more confusing.

We use terms like fuck buddies, the side piece, it’s complicated, a relationship, talking to someone.. come on! WTF do any of these mean? In what world is a girl supposed to know where she stands?

*sighs*

Of course, there is no way to tell what the outcome of every interaction will be when you date, online or otherwise, but I sure as hell know honesty is the best policy.

If you’re not looking for something serious.. tell me, if you’re looking for a girlfriend.. tell me, if you want a bang and to never talk to me again.. TELL ME!

Too often I talk to a guy who explicitly says he doesn’t want a relationship but what he meant was he didn’t want one with me. All I ask is be clear so I know how to handle the situation.

And basically to stop myself liking you..

I’m just grateful I have a world of people around me who give me great advice and know me so well.

What are your experiences of online dating? Do you find it difficult in your 20s to find anything more than just a hook up?

5 responses to “Why modern dating in my 20’s is killing me off”

  1. Becca says:

    PREACH – modern dating is screwed. I think also we are so picky now, because we can be. We have a library of people to date online. 😬 Think I’d have more luck on love island than real life 😂😂

    • katherine gallacher says:

      It’s definitely harder to date online these days, I think it doesn’t help people aren’t honest from the outset!!

  2. Lia says:

    This is my life, summed up in a blog post! I thought it was only me!!! I truly did. I walked away from dating a year ago now. And some days I miss it and most days I don’t. And explaining this to people only makes them pitty you! But I will refer them to this post. Plus you’ve inspired me to share my experience at some point xxx

    • katherine gallacher says:

      I am genuinely considering giving up!! glad that you feel able to share your experience – this post was like therapy xx

  3. K says:

    This got me thinking and I’ve never even been on any relationship – like a boyfriend girlfriend one. Now I’m confused on my thoughts about dating. Haha! But I think that the terms fuck buddies and it’s complicated are shit.

    K
    justrandomlythought.wordpress.com

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